Dienstag, September 28, 2004
22 days ago, I stood under the apex of the pyramid at the Summerhill Vineyards in Kelowna and made a wish. Apparently that is the incubation time for one to be granted.
It was the perfect ending to a fabulous weekend spent in (sunny!) Vancouver. My first trip there in 18 years. Being a total tourist. I fell in love with the place. UBC nestled out in its wilderness, the beaches (especially Jericho, where the hostel was), the Aquarium. I am such a kid. The part of Stanley Park that we strolled around that lovely afternoon. I had a mind to just enroll at the University and stay. Magical, I tell ya.
Anyway, when I made this wish a little over three weeks ago (with two delightful, polite yet non-believing travel companions, who allowed me to be the tree hugging free spirited princess I needed to be that weekend) I did not know that 22 days later would be the full moon.
Anniversaries mean a lot to me. I like to mark things by the day they happen, and celebrate that special beginning. The full moon signifies a coming together, of ideas & creativeness, of minds, bodies and souls.
So it would be fitting to mark this day as the beginning, celebrate it.
Walking across the sand
with a song in my heart
I have come back to the root
rediscovered something that
was always there
in the depths of my soul
A truer Love Joy Happiness
That neverending source,
of that it is
You represent... playfulness.
Playfulness can often be mistaken for sluttiness or
flirtiness... Flirting is something you enjoy
doing, but you're mostly just about having fun.
You're into partying, and it's seems that
people enjoy your company as much as you enjoy
What feeling do you represent?
brought to you by Quizilla
“I’ll drown all the rodents that chase after you”
“She’ll come back as fire, burn all the liars and leave a blanket of ash”
“I have the answers to the questions you have yet to ask”
And the best one:
“My mother was of the sun, my father was of the earth and I am of the universe”
Didn’t even know they were lyrics of songs… Duh!
I promptly adopted her after hiring her while running that restaurant a few years back. The little sister I never got to be a big sister to. We just have so much fun together, no matter what we’re doing. I picked her up on the way to work on Sat (we both still do catering sometimes) and she had just taken some of her roommate’s puffer medication after an unfortunate incident with the vacuum cleaner bag. I don’t think I have ever seen her this jumpy/hyper/out of control- completely spazing out in the pharmacy “let’s go, let’s go, gotta go, gotta get outta here”. Needless to say, she made me (normally the picture of calm and mellowness) jittery. So I let her drive the rest of the way.
Blasting the Hip and the Beastie Boys so loud that we were half deaf by the time we got to the function, it turned out to be an entertaining evening. The photographer I thought was so cute she declared gay on the spot- “didn’t you hear him say, there’s boys in kilts here?” No. It was a wedding- turns out the groom was a guy I went to High School with. Small world.
I got my hands in the river
My feet back up on the banks
I looked up to the Lord above and said
Hey man thanks
Sometimes I feel so good I’ve got to scream
She said Gordy Baby I know exactly what you mean
Love you girl!
Montag, September 27, 2004
Via a satellite phone from the middle of the NWT (his dad’s hunting lodge). Been there a month, he said.
Snippet from the convo:
OEM: “So, I don’t know what I’m going to be doing this winter”
SG: “That doesn’t surprise me”
There’s that saying (I think it was Oprah) about how when someone shows you who they really are, believe them the first time.
This one took a few thousand more times than usual, due to the deaf, dumb, blind and stupid tendencies most closely associated with being in love. Ha.
I think he’s going to end up being one of those people who kind of randomly drifts in and out of your life at whim, sometimes even for a good reason. He is solely responsible for my shift in consciousness about the ability to fall in love again.
And that ride was worth every second.
Funny, I turned my calendar to today’s page (it was a gift left behind from my colleague, who moved to Germany last week) and it’s a quote by Mae West: “A woman may owe a man a lovin’, but not a livin’” Double Ha.
Freitag, September 24, 2004
Es spielt gerade Mary J. Mir geht es gut. Und Euch?
Ich habe mir schon von Anfang an gedacht, das es sehr viel Sinn macht, wenn ich ab und zu mal meine Post auf Deutsch schreibe. Es ist ein Teil von mir. Mit Sicherheit hat sich eine sehr wichtige Zeit in meinen Leben auf deutsch abgespielt. Lange Zeit war meine Tagesrealitaet "leben in Bayern". Sehr interessant und verantwortlich fuer ein paar ziemlich wilde und komische Geschichten.
Das Leben ist auch komisch. Heute war irgendwie ein deutscher tag.
Ich habe mich 'unterhalten' (msning) mit einem Bekannten, einem rumaenischen Geologen, der gerade in NE Alberta seinen Beruf ausuebt. Wir haben uns ueber Gott und die Welt unterhalten, einen Satz mal auf franzoesich, mal auf deutsch. Er spricht auch spanisch, und ein paarmal habe ich das auch tatsaechlich verstanden, was er geschrieben hat.
Auf alle Faelle, er hat mich gefragt was ein Dirndl ist. Ich arbeite bei einen Bildagentur, also habe ich tausende von Bildern, die ich anschauen und auch verschicken kann. Aber ich habe nur ein Bild von einem Junge in Lederhosen finden koennen.
Aber draussen bei die Firma, wo ich teilzeit Catering mache, ist der "Deutschtag" richtig los gegannen. Ich war mit meiner suessen schatzi Katzi unterwegs (die wie ich auch halbe/halbe ist) als wir den oesterreichischen Koch getroffen haben.
Er kam gerade von einer Oktoberfest Feier zurueck, und hat seine Sachen ausgeladen. Ploetzlich haben wir RIESIGE MENGEN an deutschen Koestlichkeiten wie Spaetzle, Sauerkraut und Rotkohl (Blaukraut?) vor uns gehabt.
LECKER!! Dann hat er fuer uns ein bisserl Schuhplattler getanzt.
Une Wieso auch nicht?
Mir geht es wie gesagt super gut!
p.s. danke, Astrid, fuer die hilfe!
Donnerstag, September 23, 2004
Later on we met up with my beautiful kitty Kat, whom I also consider a dear friend, although we have only known each other a few weeks. So my 13 year old friend & my 2 week old friend met and blended seamlessly. Gotta love it when that happens! I want to take this space to thank them both so much for the much needed nurturing. You guys are the best.
You see everything, you see every part
You see all my light and you love my dark
You dig everything of which I'm ashamed
There's not anything to which you can’t relate
And you’re still here
Mittwoch, September 22, 2004
Serves me right for going to bed in a bad mood. Not to say that bad moods never happen, but when they do, I tend to have these fleeting thoughts that I won’t ever be able to get out of them.
Original Hiking Buddy (who ‘got’ the message) gave me some good advice. To be brutally honest here. If not here, then where? So here goes:
We lost our game. I am in debt. I got in shit for making calls of personal nature & not being EXACTLY on time.
Sometime between waking up, stumbling across two lost souls sleeping in the park on my way to work, and being a full 8 minutes early for work, I gained some perspective.
It’s just a game. EVERYONE is in debt. I am human.
It will come to pass.
On another note, someone told me I look hot today. I have a sexy/whimsical with a slight touch of hippie goin’ on. On probably one of the last days I can get away with wearing sandals, my toes are worth showing in
Canadian Maple Leaf
Lesson of the day:
Some people in your life deserve infinite second chances.
Dienstag, September 21, 2004
I used my toolbox yesterday evening.
This may not seem like a shocking statement to any of you out there, but it is for me. See, it’s the first time I have used it since moving in almost 4 months ago. It means I’m finally settling in, the puzzle pieces are slowly coming together to form my home.
It’s a beaut too- bright yellow with a black top, with little compartments for nails & screws and such. It was a gift from Bill, the handyman at the building where I ran a restaurant a few years ago. Not just any gift, but THE BEST GIFT I have ever received. Besides Bill serving my divorce papers for me. This toolbox came to me FULL OF TOOLS.
Bill, you’re awesome.
Quote from the fridge (ripped from a Celestial Seasonings tea box):
“I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning how to sail my ship”
-Louisa May Alcott
Musical Accompaniment to putting up shelves/pictures:
Cowboy Junkies Greatest Hits
Seven Nation Army
Montag, September 20, 2004
We have been through so much together
Fallen off the road a few times
Brakes need replacing (slow down!)
New tires (take care of those tootsies)
Blast that -fully paid for- stereo
We're going places, you and I
I actually wrote the first idea for my first post in my car,
parked at a lake in the mountains.
All I could find to write on was a flyer from Mr. Lube.
"SERVICE ENGINE SOON" says the dashboard. No fing s&%*! (sorry) but GEEZ life just hits you sometimes in the *!?%&
Oh boy. YEAH, that's part of the problem. NOT the solution, methinks. The events of the past few days have piled up on me a little, and I feel like I'm shuffling through them.
I used to be convinced that my car was a metaphor for my life. We've gone through a lot, my saturn and I. Fell off the road a few times together. We have new tires, new brakes, TLC.
I have been sitting here at the lake for at least 15 minutes and I notice now snow on the the mountain!
Yes, that was an audible sigh. Almost the kind my oma would have let from her lips. Except that this one had a definite more satisfied/content lean to it. Sitting at my laptop, at the end of an extremely crazybusy last couple of weeks, letting the spirit of Autumn sweep me up in her caress.
The first emoticon I had chosen while setting that part up was "Accomplished". Yes, do rather feel that way. Especially since I'm actually a full 9 days ahead of my estimated launching schedule. Double Woo Hoo!
Thirty had definitely been my best year thus far. So many things have begun to awaken and come alive inside- like a technicolor butterfly, if you will allow. Which you will, oblige me that is. Because that's the beauty of this thing. If you didn't want to read this you wouldn't be. Live and let live.
Which brings me to:
Quote of the day-----
"What counts is not the amount of hours you put in but how much you put into those hours"-found on a grease stained photocopied 8 1/2 by 11 taped to the wall of the appropriately named Angel's Drive -In.
I say appropriately named because that was the gold at the end of the rainbow that my new hiking buddy (aka Elf) and I found. After taking a stroll thorough the wilds along the river there it was, in all of its neon glory. Now I need to explain that I believe in the existence of elves and fairies. Extremely similar to angels, I tend to meet these lovely helping spirits haphazardly along the way. This particular one took the form of a mischievous youngin' former skateboarder/future tattoo artist.
Best question asked in our 2 hour wander:
"Do you still have a teddy bear or something that you've had forever?"
Yes, his name is Sylvester, he's a monkey and he resides on the top shelf of my bedroom closet.
Which let me to think about my other favorite possession:Bob, the lime green Philips electric kettle from Amsterdam. I love Bob. He always comes through for me. So now you know the two things I would grab if I had to flee my burning abode.
Oh goodness, I am a little all over the place, aren't I. A little like a kid in a candy store (on speed), I'm afraid. This is rather like a clean slate. Nice to have a place to throw all of my buzzing thoughts.
Recent Horoscope: "Work on something you feel is important and it will pay off. You can mix business with pleasure and accomplish what you set out to do"
You know what? I have put a hell of a lot into the past few weeks, in all areas of my life, I'd say. Between working both jobs the past 12 days (with time between to sleep), my professional and social life have to jive. Uh oh- that ALMOST counted as a whine...sorry testypea)I have been meeting tons of interesting people in all three spheres (yes, there is a *purely fun* category).
Time to sign off before I drive us all round the bend.*
*stay tuned for the explanation to that remark (My car=metaphor galore)
Out of the "okay, so I'm a klepto Files":A set of BRAND NAME double AA's out of my sister's fridge (?) for I'm not telling what.
Also doubles as Sassiest Deed of the day*
*please feel free to submit your very own SDD (yes, dem be Double Dees) to email@example.com
CURRENT MUZAK: Blue Rodeo "The Days in Between"
Just changed to Jack baby for the remainder.
Three songs played on the jukebox at the Diner tonite:
Sublime "What I got"
Shaggy "Freaky Girl" (another double d: My current theme song)
Missy "Pass that Dutch"
Hey, when in ROme!
Sonntag, September 19, 2004
Wow- my first official Post. How exciting. Quite a gloomy autumn day out
there, but inside things are hopping and buzzing. Inside my head that is.
The whole set up was a lot easier and quicker than I anticipated, and Boom!
There you go- your own little voice is live and ready to be heard. Well
listen up, 'cause I have a lot to say...