Donnerstag, September 29, 2005

Happy Thursday!

I thought it was time to lighten up a little.

But oops- all of my links are gone.

OK, it's REALLY time to start over.

Fresh starts are GOOD!

HNT pic to follow...

Montag, September 26, 2005

firsts & lasts


First best friend: Alison MacDonald. Fell in love at first sight with her boyfriend, Sean (always loved that name), at the end of grade 6. I was his shoulder to cry on when she dumped him for no reason.

First car: Dark Blue Dodge Omni. Bought at an auction for $500. I’ll never forget the thrill of raising my arm and winning that bid. Too bad it was a lemon.

First kiss: 13 or 14 (yea, I was a late bloomer), on the corner down from Trafford Drive, walking my boyfriend part of the way home. I remember walking on clouds all the way back home.

First screen name: sg (sassy girl, or ssygrl… that’s me)

First funeral: I catered one by myself, three years ago, between Christmas and New Years. Laid out the spread in the basement of the church. Other than that, just one memorial service for an old friend from elementary school’s father last year.

First album: mixed pop songs circa 1985. Featuring Cyndi Lauper’s ‘Girls Just wanna have fun” and Nina’s “99 Luftballoons”.

First pets: Bert and Bertha, Black Labs, on the farm. My dad calls everyone either Bert or Bertha, as he has a terrible memory when it comes to names.

First piercing/tatooing: Ears, when I was about eleven or twelve. None since.

First big trip: me, mom and lil sis, 5 weeks in California the summer of 1988. Absolutely awesome trip, although I think my mom had more fun than we did at Disneyland- she wanted to stay and BE Minnie Mouse.

First time skiing: Grade 6, at ‘Paskipoo’ (now Canada Olympic Park). Most horrifying moment: wiping out and having the zipper of my snow pants break, just as the two cutest boys in the school were going up the chairlift above me. Of course, I had nothing on underneath!

First concert: Crowded House @ the Jube.

First alcoholic drink: a Fuzzy Navel (oj and peach schnapps), on my thirteenth b-day

First ticket violation: can’t remember- must have blocked the memory as too painful/traumatic

First date: well, I remember it being with a cute boy I had a crush on (circa grade 5) but it wasn’t really a date as we were going to see his ‘girlfriend’ perform in a ballet. The Nutcracker, I believe.


Last car ride: Yesterday, to take Uhu to work (end of the world North, turn right). At least he gave me a tenner for gas.

Last kiss: Probably shouldn’t have happened. ‘Nuf said.

Last time you cried: Friday before last, the salsa incident.

Last movie watched: in a theater? Reverb (see second to last post).

Last food you ate: my 6’ tuna on honey oat from Subway. Surprisingly, no snacking this aft as there is something seriously wrong with my tummy.

Last love: Wasn’t allowed to come to fruition.

Last temptation: See last kiss. But we were strong!

Last item bought: Lunch. Before that, gas. At $104/litre!!

Last annoyance: See bold above.

Last time wanting to die: The afternoon after I saw my Dr. 2 ½ weeks ago. I was parked near a cliff overlooking Rundle Mountain and briefly considered what would happen if I put it in drive. I didn’t.

Last shirt worn: Probably my tux (penguin) shirt to work a catering shift.

Last alcoholic drink: Last night, a glass of red (bin 555)

Last concert: been going through my day timer, trying to figure this one out. I’m thinking it must have been the Folk Fest back in July, ‘cause I never made it to the Reggae Fest, sadly. There have been a few bands playing in bars, but that’s not really considered a concert, is it?

Last phone call: a customer, stuck on the website.

Last time at the mall: hmmmm. It’s been awhile.

Sonntag, September 25, 2005

Wait, where'd it go?

Sunday night already... Amazing how time just slips through your fingers. I had many projects on the go today, and am headed to bed only having completed ONE of them. Yes, I have brought the 3 loads of laundry to their beautiful completion. A Wholly Sucessful Follow Through. (Pats on back). That and a few dozen new songs to listen to, courtesy of this beautiful thing we call a web. I love how it instantly connects people, ideas, energy. Uhu got that laundry room sorted and spotless in less than an hour. I am truly in awe and inspired. Maybe I'll follow suit and finally refile my filing cabinet contents. Sounds about as exciting as watching paint dry. Next weekend perhaps? Um, no, that 's reserved for an entirely different project. Her name is Mar.

just call me angel in the morning

What a weekend it has been so far! This one had a decidedly Karaoke type of theme going on... My favorite singing lawyer was in a movie that premiered today - the only film of the festival that sold out! So there's another showing, Thursday at @ 4 @ the Plaza, if you're interested in laughing your face off. We've enjoyed copious amounts of sushi, bootlegged baileys in our hot chocolate, a surprise visit for a good hug (or three), and some yummy asparagus salmon cheese omelette action. Oh, and can't forget the 90 minutes of *free* thai massage. I am such a lucky biene.

Samstag, September 24, 2005

a scotch, two whiskeys and a beer

Please excuse the lack of a post yesterday,those of you who are regular readers and who may have gotten used to the regularness of late. Ha. Who am I kidding? Actually, I do have some (a couple... hi shan!) frequent visitors, and few more infrequent ones. Can't tell right now cause my counter thing is kaputt.

There was a good reason for the lack of a post. I was too busy getting my mom schloshed (is that even actually a word and is that how you spell it?) and enjoying an excellent dinner here, prepared and served by my dear precious sweet Uhu. Who is not only an excellent cook, but the biggest charmer in the West- he had mommy dearest effortlessly wrapped around his little finger!

A fine evening (and a bottle of wine) was had by all (each ~ hic!). Yes, we had three- two whites and a red. On a Thursday night. Why the hell not. Tucked the Mama with her doggies in for a nap and headed over to the lounge (read: couches in garage) next door to lounge with my lovely neighbour lady. All that place needs is a lava lamp and it's perfection, I'm tellin ya!

Sat and giggled with her and the U man till way past my bedtime, recalling stories of Oktoberfests past, among other adventures in Munich. I have recently 'found' a German speaking group, and an Oktoberfest here in Cowtown to go to. Seriously thinking of breaking out the dirndl. Seriously though, it will be nice to have a Stammtisch again, as I did living in Germany with my English speaking group. Miss those guys.

Prost! Und eins, zwei, drei, 'gsouffa!

Mittwoch, September 21, 2005

early and blurry HNT

this one's called 'my fav freckle'... Can you see it? This is also one of my fav necklaces- bought it in Banff the fateful weekend of the breakup in May. My massage therapist told me that my heart chakra was blocked and I should wear some rose quartz close to it.

It feels pretty open now. Sure, it has had its strings tugged on a few times since, and I think it must be the origin of all the maternal instincts and occasional longing type feelings... It sure got a good workout this past week and a half, with all of the goings on in the crib. Explosions of emotions, all around. But we have learned to survive, me and my heart. Some times the love comes out tougher than usual, but it's all a process towards healing. And kepping the family together. N'est ce pas? Funny, my twist on the 'it's not you, it's me' speech I delivered yesterday came out 'my heart's just not in it'. Nope, it's too busy over here, lovin' the fam.

holy groceries, batman

I have this cycle of emotions I go through just about every time I go grocery shopping.
It's pretty complex yet pretty simple at the same time.

I kinda dread going lately, 'cause life's suddenly gotten really expensive recently for various reasons (the least of which that *ouch* unplanned for car repair bill from the un\fortunate Kelowna gas pump incident.

Then I say damn it! Ya need to eat, right?

And the various items from the list you've been composing in your head get checked off, one by one. There's always a few surprises, the spice of life so zu sagen, but mostly it's good, healthy food that goes in the cart (you know you mean business if it's not just the little red basket that you end up grabbing at the door). Then, after laying out *gulp* over a hundred dollars, a grilled veggie burger in my tummy, and a leisurely drive home, I have this.

sauerkraut raisins branflakes maplesyrup yoghurt salsa eggs celery carrots trailmix freshcilantro tomatoes *batteries* toothbrushes tea tea tea tea (two for one) 12grainbread waffles fishoilcapsules pastasauce x2 beans chickpeas naturalpeanutbutter redpepper snowpeas apples avocados brownrice juice WHEW!


razzberry stoli & cc cookies
if you answered
"what's for dinner?"
you'd be right

the after yoga feeling
tainted with the heavy
dear john task
over the phone

crumb collector
as the green runs out
just as inspired?

someone lit a fire
attached those wheels
to my feet
and a hot air balloon to my heart

Dienstag, September 20, 2005

a 'meme' cause I hate that word!

Ten Years Ago: I was 21, already married two years, living in small town Germany, still working at the bakery, I think. I may still have had my almost waist length hair, and ALL of my innocence.

Five Years Ago: The year 2000 was a very turbulent one. I know that we celebrated New Years in Amsterdam (and the year before, and the year after). I had left my husband earlier this year, and spent almost 8 months moving around Munich ~5 different places~ whew! I was finishing school and starting my career here . It was around this time that he finally got his Canadian Visa, and we got back together and started preparations for our move here.

One Year Ago: I was already six months in to my new job (finally back doing what I went to school for), my heart nicely healed from the last time it got broken. ***Oh my Goodness!!! Yesterday was my one year Blog anniversary!!!*** I had just met my Kat, and was still glowing from my fabulous Labour day weekend extravaganza in Vancouver.

Five Snacks: healthy or not healthy? Chocolate ~any kind~, Wine Gums, Oreos, Dried Fruit, popcorn

Five Things I would do with $100 Million: give a couple to each member of my family (birth and urban), donate a bunch to charity (especially hurricane relief), travel the world, open my yoga retreat on the Okanogan, hmmm that’s it!

Five places to run away to: Naramata, PEI, Amsterdam, Greece, New Zealand

Five Things I would never wear: white shoes after Labour day, camouflage, a watch, stilettos, fur

Five Favourite shows: ever? 21 Jump Street, ER, Ally McBeal… The Simpsons and Friends are probably the only ones I can tolerate now (pretty sad, I know).

Five Biggest Joys: the feeling I have after a yoga class, holding a brand new baby, getting flowers, hearing from old friends, falling in love

Five Favourite Toys: Barney! (my own X rated purple friend), online radio, my rollerblades, bubble blower, hmmm I need more toys!

Now you!

Montag, September 19, 2005

weekend rejuvination

It might be easier to start with the *freshly baked* oatmeal chocolate chip cookies and work my way backwards.

Wrote a ttd list dated two days ago and just realized that I got 5 out of the 6 things on it done. Wahoo!

Hmm. Maybe I will start at the beginning (which is a very good place to start, actually). In a crumpled heap in my Kat's arms, sobbing because the jar of broken salsa on the kitchen floor was the straw that finally broke this camel's back. Funny how it's usually a little thing (spilt milk) that will send you over the edge.

She provided a much needed cuddle, and sent me out the door twenty minutes later with her rollerblades on my feet (and wristguards, I'm not completely nuts, people). This proved to be exactly the ticket, and I wondered to myself (after picking myself up and dusting myself off after the first ~and only~ crash down the big hill into the park) why I hadn't been out blading here before, during the whole year and a half I have lived here.

Back home and bathed in lavender, I felt 100% more me. Thus induced the string of events which have brought me to this Sunday evening (now Monday day), taking a moment to reflect upon them...

Two more walks in the 'hood to soak up some much needed vitamin D... Some play therapy on the first, with a pause by the monkey bars and swings. Some errands on the second, with a trip to the post office and a long overdue visit to the incredible middle eastern deli.

We feasted on take-out Tabouli, Hummus, Spanokopita, Stuffed wine leaves, olives, tzaziki. Mmmmmm. I could still taste the garlic this morning. But that's okay, cause my two (yes, two) dates happened well before the breath altering experience that was lunch.

We watched a whole bunch of silly movies, and I completed my first freelance wedding reception decoration gig. Rewarded myself with a set of dark blue flannel sheets. Oh so comfy... wish I could crawl back between them right now, in fact.

This Monday would suck, except for the free sushi lunch I had (the first perk that came from being a part of the company's Christmas party planning committee). Hmm. That's the third mention of food in one post. Am I becomming a foodie?

Donnerstag, September 15, 2005

Laurel's fav quote:

just remember.... the harder you fall.. the higher you will bounce!!!

How the urban family needed to hear this today. Recent events have made it really difficult to gather thoughts to put into post form. Sufficient to say, there's gonna be a whole lotta recovering going on. With the help of a lotta love love love.

Montag, September 12, 2005

can we get any more introspective than this?

Today's horoscope:

It is a long road to becoming exactly the person you want to be, SG. Remember that you can't change who you are. Input from every person you know, and lessons from every bump in the road all contribute to who you are as a person. Be proud of yourself, but also realize that there is a great deal more developing that needs to be done on an internal level. Meditate or just stick to yourself for a little while to go inward.

Donnerstag, September 08, 2005

Many rivers to cross

The feeling that I was precisely where I should be washed over me as I drove up the winding road to Lake Minnewanka. Breathe in, breathe out. Repeat. How come it’s so easy to forget that simple procedure?

A sure sign that I have been stressed lately: the insides of my cheeks are raw from chewing on them. This is a rather new habit- observed over the past two or three months. And a lot of jaw clenching.

I am a person who believes that different ailments/illnesses relate directly to life situations/conflicts. Shoulders hurt? You’re taking on too much responsibility. Stomach pains? You’re sick from worry & have unspoken relationship tension. My firmly shut mouth speaks volumes that I am not.

Maybe it’s time to get verbal?

Holding it all inside really only makes it worse. Und sauer! It’s time to be wisely honest with myself, and clear those cobwebs once and for all. Make something of myself during this time spent on earth- contribute while at the same time being true to my truest inner self.

I have paused here (and paused, and paused due to a couple of Mountain Goat jams) to gather and make note of these thoughts that have floated into my mind, as I drink in all of the beauty of the Lake and mountains that surround me.

Although I had anticipated bad news from the Doctors office today, there was a twist for the worse in store for me.

I feel like a puppy that has been kicked, whimpering, crawling into my safe spot for peace, shelter and to heal. I feel like staying in this place for an extended period of time. I’m so shattered to the core that it’s going to take me a very long time to pick up these pieces.

Realistically, I know I can’t hide out here in the protection of the mountains forever (although it is such a tempting and comforting thought). I have to return to the city, to my job and my life and live day to day adding more and more of the things that make me happy to it.

Spending time with friends and family, yoga, soccer, working out regularly, taking bubble baths, preparing healthful food and sharing it with my urban family.

I feel their support, even all the way out here. And I’m deeply thankful for the soft place to land that lovingly awaits me upon my return.

But for now, as the raindrops landing on the windshield multiply, I’ll head back down the winding road into the semi-civilization of the township (I used to call it Disneyland) and cook up a lovely scallop veggie teriyaki vermicelli stir fy to accompany our lovely red wine. My Banfite Butt-saver (how I *heart* you, babe!) and I are going to dine, read our fairy cards, and if I’m lucky, she’ll work on some of those lumps in my back a little…

Dienstag, September 06, 2005

groovin tuesday *Show Me LOVE*

Peace has returned to the valley. It's a (strangely) smoke free evening, hangin' out collaging with my Kat. All very low key, chicken noodles for supper, crossing my fingers that this scratchy throat won't turn into a full blown cold. Please, not before the weekend of the biggest tournament of the year (and my chance to make an extra month's rent in three days). Gotta be on my game for that one, for shizzle.

We've got 'back to the 90's' on the good old internet radio, and it's one of those moments where the song's lyrics apply... Good vibrations. Yup. You create your own reality, and we have regained the happy flow. Lisa Stansfield, Paula Abdul, it's a flashback sing along night.

Off to the mountains for a few days (it was Sharon Stone who said "and if you feel good, then make sure you do the things that make you stay happy. Do what makes you feel genuinely happy and loved"). So I'm gonna.

this was taken last week when I finally figured the webcam out. I call it "Sass figures it out". Yup, them be pigtales in my hair- I had just gotten off the soccer field.

Montag, September 05, 2005

adventures in mountain goat land

Have you ever butted heads with someone, simply because you were each trying to love eachother in the best way you knew how?

That's when you call in the super-glue Mr. Uhu to the rescue. In fact, his services were required by the neighbours this evening as well, but that's whole 'nother story for a whole 'nother time.

It has been an extremely exhausting day, emotionally. But it's safe to say that all is now well again under our roof, and the lessons have been duly learned. It's extremely helpful to have a third 'innocent bystander' there to analyze and explain the situation from his (incredibly astute and accurate) point of view.

The bee has been stung herself, and will now be more careful with her wordage in the future , lest it come out sounding motherly. Grasshopper has discovered that not everyone can jump as high as she can. What a shame that the others stuck down below have to miss this view! She has so much love and energy to bring forth into the world, and is just searching for the right field to land in.

The one constant is that there's love all around. Love love love. All around and through us, floating through both floors of this house we're (somewhat painstakingly, at the moment) making into our home.

Love IS all you need.

Sonntag, September 04, 2005

snapshots of wisdom

One of the best things about cleaning out junk drawers is finding all the junk YOU decided was treasure, at some point in your life. Another good side effect is a clearing of the cobwebs of the mind. Once I finally stopped the procrastination yesterday, I sat down and got it all sorted in about 4 1/2 hours. Including a few manditory 'inspirational' breaks, of course, and a bit of a lie down and chit chat on the blankie in the backyard while it was still sunny.

Here are a few of the bits and pieces I came accross and put into a nice little BLUE (color of Sept, doncha know) box :

According to a 'keepsake card' with my real name on it, it means I enjoy captivating my audience. My curiosity makes me one who desires to know things and I have an artistic nature. I give joy and comfort to all around me, I am quite a character. I'll give a helping hand or a friendly smile. Others call me a wise one for my knowledge and I am full of drive.

The card was a gift from my far away Louise, and I agree with everything except the last point. Mind you, it doesn't specify what kind of drive, does it? I'd say it's the scenic drive to Shedonism, these days.

There's a temporary tatto that says "ALOHA" in colourful sparkly letters. Mark it down on the Halloween costume idea list.

More temp tattoos- red Maple leaves.

The brochure from the Van Aquarium is in there, upon which I wrote this poem.

A photocopied little square of paper my yoga teacher sent me, entitled:

Take a breather
A Breath of Fresh Air

Wanna know what it says? Tough, I'm gonna write it anyways.

The quality of the air you breathe is important. Get outside at every opportunity. Think how wonderful it feels to breathe in air from a pine forest or from a salty ocean breeze.

Put plants and flowers in your house. Remember they put out oxygen.

Every day, even in sub-zero temperatures, air out your house for a few minutes. This means opening a couple of windows. The good news for those afraid of heating bills is fresh air heats a lot faster than recycled air.

I think that's enough wisdom emparting for now.

Tomorrow: the merging of the files. Oooh, how exciting.

Samstag, September 03, 2005

Procrastination tactic #1

How many countries have you visited?

9% 21 countries

create your own visited countries map

long weekend goodness

Not even noon yet, and I'm up, showereddressedbreakfasted and ready to go! Not a great wonder, since I was awoken at eight (after only 4 hours of sleep) by a text message from one of the condenders. A few minus points there for sure...

My goal over the next three days is to get all of my filing/paperwork/junk drawers sorted. Unless life has other plans for me, that is. A trip to the mountains with freshly returned Kat may be in the works, to check out a job opportunity for her.

I love love love having three days off in a row. Doesn't happen that often as I work most Canadian holidays. It looks as though the weather will be nice too- I'm heading out soon to check out a few open houses with the Mama. As soon as I have that first drawer cleaned out!! *put a little prayer that the organizational fairies are working with me here*

Uhu's quote of the night

Laundry quandries in the urban crib:

"I had to give Whitney my Dickies"

The moral of the story is: when you commit to it, follow through.

Donnerstag, September 01, 2005

tied cause the ref sucked

my msn name as of late.

Wow, it's midnight. Time flies when you're kicking butt on the soccer field, catching up with Miss K and completing various beauty treatments (toe polish looks a little blackish instead of purple, oops).

Well, my IIFs, I finally did it. And it really wasn't that hard. I figured out how the nifty webcam works! And thus, I present to you, my first ever self-taken (with the help of Kat's mouseclick) digital image, broadcast within minutes of having 'figured it out'.

This doesn't really do the henna art justice- I got it done Saturday afternoon at the Stagette I attended, and it'll last about 2-3 weeks. The lovely and ever so talented Ms L did the art, on myself and the other lovelies in attendance. Then we took ourselves for a wonderful meal at a Turkish restaurant, where I had more memories & flashbacks than you can shake a stick at (having had turkish in-laws for eight or nine years).

That ceramic round thing (does it have a specific name? I do not know) is also from Turkey, one of the only souvenirs I brought back with me from my trip in '95. 10 years ago. Time does fly. And life just keeps getting better & better.

Good to have you home, Grasshopper!